"The Perfect Man is a Fictional Character"

Are you a woman? Are you looking for the Perfect Man? Have you found him?

Any woman who claims to have found the Perfect Man is living in a bubble. She is yet to be disillusioned. There are no perfect men.

Yes, I said it.

But ladies, before you start male bashing, please consider the number of times you have been let down by men. I bet its 9 out of 10 times. And if that's the case, don't you feel that maybe its time you started resizing your expectations?

Loads have been written about the fairer sex. Everyone tries to understand women, analyse them. I just wish the same efforts were extended to men. And no, I am not asking you to rationalise the deeds of a rapist. I am asking you to try and understand the common man. The normal guys, the husbands and the boyfriends of the world. These are the guys that face the maximum amount of criticism on the hands of women.

The problem is with the comparison. A man is not compared with other men. Instead he is compared to the idea of an ideal man. And this idea is a figment of the woman's imagination. Its not even remotely based on any living person. Sounds kind of hard to match, doesn't it?

I have often wondered about why women have such fantasies regarding the men they want. I tried to understand this and failed. And then I started dating. I observed my dates and that led me toward clarity. You see the problem with women is that they believe that they can actually change their men. Silly ladies!!

Men will be men. A cliché it might be, but it is true.

I will not generalize any statement about men. I will talk about myself instead. I am a certain kind of guy. How I am is based on my life experiences, both good and bad. And for better or for worse, I am the way I am. I can't change. And even if I could change, that'd take a long time and a lot of personal conditioning.

I am a gentle guy. I am usually good to my dates. I am almost what they'd like me to be. Almost. Thats the key word here. My dates would like me to be more expressive. And I am not. I just can't find it in myself to speak more than I do. Maybe coz I don't find myself important enough to discuss my life with anyone. They have a problem with the way I deal with my problems. And I don't know how to change that.

Even though I tell my dates who I am right at the beginning, never mincing my words, I end up in situations where they expect something from me that I can't give. So its evident now that they had expected that they could change me for the better. Isn't that a little unfair? I agree I am not the easiest person to be around. But neither am I that difficult to be with.

And as far as the other general complaints that women have about men, the solution is simple. Look at how guys are brought up. Their priorities are set on a different scale than that of women. And hence, they look at the world differently. They concentrate on different topics than women. Their approach to situations differs from that of women.

The sooner women understand it, the better it is for them.

And even then, they won't find the perfect man. But they might find happiness with a "regular" man.